Malibi: noun; a male excuse to avoid blame, especially at work: "Sorry, car trouble." (as opposed to female, sincere explanations that evoke little to no sympathy from male superiors or childless coworkers, i.e., "Sorry, puking toddler," or “back to school night.”)
Lying would have been so much easier. After all, hadn’t I been popping Vitamin C and Zycam for days hoping to stave off the flu that had downed everyone else in the office this year? Would it be that hard to simply call in the morning and beg off from the evening baseball game with claims of a nasty cold that I actually kind of had? But no, I decided to fess up with my coworkers, mistakenly thinking the appeal of a working mom asking to skip out on the team outing so that she could watch her three-year-old son compete in his first ever swim meet would fall on sympathetic ears. Wrong.
Less than five minutes after sending the email to my coworkers explaining the predicament (mom away for three days just learned her son’s sporting event conflicted more...
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Tags:Colleagues & Coworkers, Guilt: The Bad G-spot, On The Career Track
Stubble Shock: noun; state of anxiety induced by the sudden realization – typically on the commute into work – that one is wearing a skirt but has neglected to shave her legs (and possibly, pits).
Okay, let’s face it: this is not a syndrome exclusive to working moms. Most of us can remember a time or two when this panicked realization occurred during our single girl days as well, particularly when hitting the beach slightly hung over the day after a particularly crazy night out. The difference back then was that it was more likely our bikini area we were sweating over (remember these were pre Brazilian days for most of us) and the time elapsed between our last encounter with a razor is probably much more lengthy these days. I mean, what married woman – let alone a working mom married woman – has the time to shave on any regular basis? And most of the time, boots, opaque tights, long dresses and forgiving husbands let us skate along in the hairy zone until an absolute necessity arrives … more...
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Tags:Looks: Is This Mirror Working?, WoMo Book (untitled)
July 18th, 2010, posted by Marcie
Working moms excel at now chow, though college students aren’t far behind (minus the precious plastic dishes). Give a WoMo a microwave and she can serve up a five-food-group meal faster than you can say “McDonalds.” Of course, the vegetable group may be represented by ketchup and the grains by breadcrumb crust on nuked chicken nuggets… but it’s a good idea to kiss the cook anyway. She’s probably had a killer day.
If organic is available, most of us will reach for that first because the thought of our sweet munchkins ingesting pesticides meant for dirty little bugs is disgusting. For ease and speed, however, we conveniently forget about all the hydrogenated crap in pre-packaged and processed food (erps). So. This brings up an important fact: do not discuss now chow with other moms. Those I-love-Jessica-Seinfeld's-book-I-have-time-to-make-my-own-baby-food girls won't understand the need for lightening fast fare. And even though two-minute meal prep is a talent (survival tactic) many of us employ, talking about it will only make us feel more guilty than more...
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iSmudge: noun; description of the greasy build-up on your smartphone’s screen attributed to too many instances of using it as a convenient babysitter/distraction during restaurant meals.
What in the heck did working moms do before smartphones? (Oh yeah, it was just a couple years ago, you didn't even have one. Insane.) There are few greater ways to while away a boring sandbox session than by clearing out annoying emails or catching up on friend's Facebook posts. And how did our parents survive the torturous wait for the check after a restaurant meal without the ability to click on an airplane game or an episode of Spongebob Square Pants to buy four minutes of reprieve from whining? But as we all know, small fingers + french fries, quesadillas, grilled cheese, corn dogs, and/or peanut-butter and jelly + glass surface = a cloudy screen even the best Windex would have a hard time clearing away. Oh well, you were due for an upgrade soon, right?
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Tags:WoMo Book (untitled), WoMo Words
July 9th, 2010, posted by Marcie
Unlike women who ricochet through their days like a wild pinball, men target a single task at time, two if the timing is right. For the busy mom or even the eager single gal, this may result in aggravation (as well as complete and utter dismay) with the males in her life.
Of course, the WoMo Girls have a couple of thoughts on the matter.
THIS is a man's brain...
We suspect that if you were to make a map of man’s mind, it would look a lot like Interstate 5 (a long and straight two-lane highway with occasional, well-announced exits every 45 minutes). So. Please don't expect a guy to load the dishwasher while he’s knuckling down on prepping a meal. His mind doesn't work that way. And let's face it, if there’s an electronic gadget vying for his attention, the illuminated screen will always win. Avoid situations where you want a task to be completed if his in-box has unread mail or he’s in the middle of more...
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Remember the first time you ventured outside your California roll sushi safety zone to try maguro nigiri? How about when you quit your first crappy job (slinging franks at Chicago Hot Dog Company, circa 1985) to hit the big time with a night time gig (hostess at Bobby McGee’s San Ramon, circa 1986, woo-hoo). Maybe you recall the liberating moment you switched your major from what your parents always wanted you to study (Business Economics) to something that interested you … however impractical (hello, Mass Communications!) Or the day you decided to ditch a sad sack loser boyfriend for the much hotter dude who is now your hubby? The common theme to all of these experiences is the joy in embracing change and seeing where a shift in direction will take you.
In that spirit of reinvention, we have decided to try on a new concept for this blog that’s tied closely to one of the favorite parts of our book: a glossary of WoMo Words. From now until the end of the summer, we are going to try more...
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Tags:WoMo Book (untitled)
